In regards to Str8, it started out as a point-grinding game/VN and the early chapters really, really reflect that (there is a walk-through text file in the VN's main folder that helps with that). There is a revamp underway to correct that.
No VN is without fault but some of Str8's comes from a shift in focus from the dev(s).
"Who did you think Spidey was? ;)"
I know you didn't ask me but I'll answer anyway.
Given that Justin's friends knew about the notebook, I didn't see any of them leaving it there if they had found it. Especially if they had read it.
That left only Eyal, Theo or someone we hadn't met.
(And I had hoped for the third option, that Spidey actually had nothing to do with the Hunt and he would be another dimension of the situation that Justin would have to deal with.)
On the most recent update, I like the original versions of the massage and nighttime better. The new massage positioning isn't realistic like the original and the the nighttime doesn't look like someone trying to sneak one in with all that hip action. Lucky the bed doesn't squeak, I guess.
Change for the sake of change isn't necessarily a good thing.
I really like this. A nice blend of real and fantasy. LOL'd at Bent!? and think it's cool you are giving your fellow dev's project some love. Should do that with Hollow too.
I do have a spoilery question to ask:
Spoiler below
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Are we seeing the same series of events with just different hookups for Hope or are they really three separate series of events?
What I mean is, for example, is that each path has Hope aware of different eye colors. (Red* and Blue; Red, Gold and Blue; Red, Purple and Blue).
Will all those eye colors eventually be in play or are they unique to the path they are found on?
I guess what am really wanting to know is how much of what we learn about a character on one path applies to the character on another?
*(Or orange, I suppose)
This was just a side project on my part, a chance to learn something about renpy that I'm not currently using myself. I only shared it because it turned out to be a bit simpler in renpy than I initially thought and I thought it might help you out.
Whether having the poker be interactive adds anything to the story...? Definitely not my call.
One thing to note is that the majority of my diagram is in the VN.
Zack's flawless victory is 44,43,42,41,40
Braden's flawless is 44,34,24,14,04
The nail-biter is 44,43,33,32,22,21,11, 10 or 01
Not there: hands 23,13,12,31 strip 30,20,03,02
So of the 24 nodes, 16 were represented in the VN.
And you have almost all the image assets already done and in the game. The only noticeable miss is Zack watching with just his shirt off (I think there are a couple of 'no shoes' needed as well).
And of course all of the poker game's branching doesn't matter, because everything should flow back to the scene where Braden towels up, declares he's 'done playing' and heads off to shower.
Anyway, good luck with however you do it.
Cool. I read in one of you're replies to someone that you had wanted the poker sequence to be more interactive Being and old CompSci guy, I have been dinking around with that using this decision tree:
-movement is top to bottom
-The numbers are clothing layers (4 for Zack, 4 for Braden to begin)
-The yellow nodes are hands (and separate renpy labels) and each row of yellow is a round.
-The black lines are renpy jump commands.
-The player decides who wins in a menu.
-I'm using a variable to track who was the previous winner for those nodes that have two entry points and an if-then test to provide the appropriate dialog.
-The nodes with zeroes on them represent the strip scenes.
-What is not on the diagram is the four labels you would need for the post-Braden-win strip that Braden does.
-In my version, Zack's wins move down and left, Braden's down and right.
Sorry, I forgot I'd posted this here so I wasn't looking for a reply. Didn't mean to come across as ghosting.
My own story is less about self-acceptance and more about surviving with a closeted side in the US Navy in the 1980s. I was just going to write something up in Word but renpy really lets you tell the story in a satisfying way. Don't know if I'll ever share it publicly, at least in the raw form with everyone's real names.
And I thought the original dialog was a nice blend of posturing, bantering and d*ckish behavior as the two got to know each other. It's one of the things that stood out to me because typically in these VNs, everyone is almost an insta-friend so we can get to the sex. (aside: I'm finding that it helps me in doing my writing to read the dialog out loud.)
To be more specific about the shower scene, Braden has just caught this stranger named Zack, who "told" him that he was bi, checking him out in the shower. I find the new version takes the fact that they're strangers still into account whereas the older version really didn't.
And the floor numbering thing wasn't really a complaint (none of this is really, just feedback) but a Slumdog Millionaire moment.
Anyway, keep up the great work.
Just out of curiosity, how far out is the poker game?
Played the revamped version of day one. Mostly a vast improvement over the original and I like the subtle changes that set up later conversations.
I do think the dialog between the two characters sounds more like college professors rather than college students now. Just doesn't seem as natural and spontaneous as it did before.
Braden's reaction in the shower is closer to what I would expect as a response to Zack creeping and probably my favorite story change of the first day.
A comment about Braden dragging his stuff up to the fourth floor when the room is stated later to be on the third reminded me of a story my younger brother told me.
How, when he was in the Air Force and stationed in the UK he never really got used to how they numbered their floors. In the US, the ground floor and first floor are typical the same. In the UK, you often have to go up a flight of stairs to get to the first floor. Drove him crazy.
Heh, didn't expect such a quick response. Sorry this post wasn't more timely. Not enthusiastic about joining yet another online site; Will have to think about that. In the mean time, here is some more-detailed feedback, none of which diminishes the emotional impact the overall story has had so far.
--the following contains spoilers--
I have played the game through three times. First time I played it through, which was prior to my first comment, I made what I thought were sensible choices. Have played it twice through again, once choosing what seemed like respect choices and once choosing what seemed like perv choices.
I was surprised that Zack still apologized at the pond (respect path) for nocturnal creeping even though I as the player actively tried to avoid that path. I even avoided going to the shower to observe Braden's shadow beating. And speaking of that, no mention of the shower wall on that respect path. My expectation there was for Zack to only apologize for the creeping that was beyond the player's control (like the removal of the shower wall.) Otherwise, why give a choice at all?
On the perv route, I had expectations going in that the two would be going their separate ways from the gym, with maybe Zack and Mikhail ending up together. I mean, how many times can Braden forgive Zack's BS. Glad it didn't go that way though. (Of course, it might have been interesting if they had separated only to have Max thrust them back together at the end of Chapter 9, since his plan was already in motion by time of the gym confrontation. Have them deal with each other in the room that first night rather than in the gym. The gym feels too public a forum for that discussion anyway.)
Max also missed a loophole when it came to Braden's phone; Zack was at swim practice earlier on the same night as the swim lesson and fire so the phone could have been left then--by anyone at practice. All Zack had to say was"Oops, I left that at the end of swim practice, can I have it back?" or words to that effect. Though Max's performance during the meeting is beyond awesome.
I also seemed to miss how Zack ends up with Braden's phone. Was that there somewhere?
I feel that some mention of the shower lights is needed since messing with a thermostat might not burn down a dorm but a poor wiring job repairing some commercial lighting definitely could.
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This is getting way too long so just a few questions:
Any significance to to Cody wearing the shirt Braden rejected when shopping? (LOL, BTW, on shopping at Ashley's Boutique)
How much foreshadowing is in the third screen presented to the player when the game first launches? (BTW, I think there should be a way to disable the warning screens after you've started the game the first time.)
Do we ever get optional dialog on:
-Braden's bisexual friend in high school? (so expected this to come up again to the point that maybe it is a Chekhov's Gun detail)
-How Braden's GF embarrassed him enough for the breakup?
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Some but not all of my fav moments
-park after the bar.
-beach shower "I where know your heart is."
-the entire night swim.
-Max breaking the fourth wall by throwing shade on clicky text-base games.
-Max's wave (As someone who knows that ADHD isn't something you grow out of but learn to manage, Max became a fav rather quickly. This scene punched hard.).
------------And add me to the list of peeps curious to know what 3D software you are using for your visuals. Because part of what sells your story is the cinematic realism of your 3D assets.
Wow. This was an unexpected experience. Left me very emotional. Wish I had the eloquence of Zack's internal monologue to express just how impactful it was. Looking forward to the conclusion.
One question, since this is in alpha: Is there a preferred method or path back to you for feedback on nits or hiccups spotted?
